DEAR ABBY: During the past year, my terrific father-in-law was widowed and became unable to live alone. He deals with us now and is part of our daily life. However, he has dementia.
He is still rather social and spoken. If you fulfilled him, you might not understand that his short-term memory seldom works or that the filters this well-educated and appropriate guy when had no longer work 24/ 7.
Recently, he has started ogling women and making remarks about their physical characteristics when we go grocery shopping or take a walk. He is also beginning to puzzle the females’s functions in our family (me, my child, daughter-in-law and niece), which has become even more uncomfortable. My daughter confided that he made a sexual comment about me. (I’m a middle-aged, no-nonsense type of woman.)
How does one technique such a scenario?
CARETAKER WITH An ISSUE
DEAR CARETAKER: It’s time for you to contact the Alzheimer’s Association.
If unsuitable behavior happens in public, correspond and kind, but firmly advise the person that the habits is not OK. It might help to sidetrack the individual from the instant circumstance by directing their attention in other places or giving them something else to do.
Caregivers can produce “company cards” mentioning briefly, “My companion has dementia. Please be understanding.”
Caregivers would give these to hosts and people hosting when entering restaurants, or quietly hand them to salespeople if situations start to weaken due to the fact that the companion shows unusual habits or lack of a spoken filter.
Be transparent with family and pals about the individual with the disease.
DEAR ABBY: I’m a teen living with a foot in each world.
Lately, things have taken a turn for the worse.
TEENAGER IN CHAOS
DEAR TEENAGER IN TURMOIL: Just this. You are a teen. There are better days ahead for you. Your current situations might be undesirable, but they won’t last permanently. If living your truth will result in your being shunned, do whatever you must to make it through in the meantime.
Dear Abby is composed by Abigail Van Buren, also referred to as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Contact Dear Abby at www.DearAbby.com or P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.
